Spring Cleaning Life

Wednesday, May 09, 2012

Are we wired to want to do it all? Us women, I mean. Are we? What is it in some of us that makes us wish for literally just 45 more minutes in the day? Then we'd be able to do it all. Have a full-time career, a growing family, a sound marriage, meaningful friendships, hobbies that we're good at, volunteering, time for exercise, gardening, decorating a home, traveling .. or even just finishing a book. Are we afraid to be seen not doing it all? Of how others may judge us? Maybe we'll lose connection? Do we measure our value in how much we can cram in one day?

I'm always leery when I hear someone say, "You really can have it all!" Something has to give, it has to. Am I right? If you're squeezing on one end, something is bound to explode on the other. Like a tube of toothpaste. And if you are doing it all, are you doing it all well? Or are you just in attendance?

I've started feeling as if I'm just in attendance. I show up, smiling, get the picture taken for proof, but I'm not really doing my best while I'm there. I've got too many other things running- a few very important that enrich my life, but mainly there's just a lot of fluff. That wears on you after a while.

So I've begun to say No. By asking myself if this is something that is adding to my life. If my gut says No, then my voice says No. I'm learning to trust my gut.
Spring cleaning my life, feels good. Have you done something similar?

-lila
Image, aspens in Colorado

4 comments:

  1. First off, I'm loving the blog redesign! Very chic. And I love this post...it's so true that we can try to do everything, but I think it's healthy to question why. And not be afraid to say no. This is something I'm learning...slowly...

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    1. Thank you, thank you! I'm only starting to say No, it's not easy doing, particularly for a people-pleaser like me. Baby steps. Chad helps ;) I'm sure Brendan gives you honest advice when you need it most!

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  2. Lila! I agree with Lauren, the blog redesign is awesome! Mad me start rethinking my blog and how it is a complete mess. Anyway, I call spring cleaning life "weeding my friend garden" because sometimes you just need to get rid of the people that are holding up space in your closet of life. I really don't agree with Bethany Frankel when she says Place of Yes because when you say Yes to everything you lose yourself.

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    1. Brei! Thank you for the kind words. And no comparing - that's not allowed here! I too subconsciously weed my friends. It may seem terribly selfish to some but I'm a firm believer in that some friends are meant to be with you forever, and others were only there during a specific time for a reason.

      Ps, Funny thing is that this post was originally titled 'A Place of No'.

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